Financial Implications During A Divorce When the Woman is the Primary Bread Winner with Heather Hostetter

By Leah Jones on July 19, 2021

A growing number of female breadwinners are facing the prospect of paying alimony and child support after a divorce. But although ending a marriage is often a difficult and unanticipated process, there are ways to prepare for and reduce the cost of financial consequences. In this episode of Everything Money, Hightower Bethesda’s Director of Financial Planning, Leah Jones, sits down with Heather Hostetter, a Partner at Hostetter Trent LLC and specialist in family law, to discuss how female breadwinners can better approach and manage divorce proceedings.
Here are some of the key issues for female breadwinners to address when legally dissolving a marriage.

Alimony

Of the two types of alimony, the more common is rehabilitative, in which a spouse receives short-term financial assistance to gain job skills and become self-supporting. Indefinite alimony, by contrast, requires a dependent spouse to continue receiving payment until death or a court decision that alimony is no longer necessary. In either case, the breadwinner should not expect the court to factor fault – or a particular spouse’s culpability for the marriage’s dissolution – into an alimony decision. Fault tends to be shared by both parties, and it is only in extreme cases that a court would reduce or eliminate alimony due to a spouse’s actions during the marriage.
Historically, male partners were likelier to expect court-ordered alimony payments, as they were usually the primary breadwinners. However, as a greater proportion of men have adopted non-monetary family responsibilities, and more high-income women have begun supporting the household, these women are now also shouldering new roles in divorce proceedings – roles for which they are not always prepared.

Child Support

Female breadwinners often fear that child support is not directed towards their children and may attempt to pay for most or all of a child’s extracurricular activities, like tutoring and athletics, to ensure their money is appropriately handled. Despite court orders, it is natural to suppose that some money may not be allocated towards core expenses, so it can be helpful to discuss child support expectations with a partner well before divorce becomes a possibility.

How to Prepare

One, sign a prenuptial or postnuptial agreement. Setting terms in advance of a divorce can alleviate some of the uncertainty of later proceedings and can provide base expectations if income levels shift during a marriage.

Two, communicate openly and honestly with your partner before and during a marriage. It is especially important to be upfront with your partner if financial situations change during a marriage, as financial discussions between breadwinners and dependents, or between two working partners, do not typically occur as frequently as they should.

Three, understand that courts are not meant to be empathetic and may not take the breadwinner’s side. Moreover, court decisions can be surprisingly subjective, and different judges may weigh the facts of a given case in a variety of ways.
If you are interested in learning more about how female breadwinners can navigate a divorce, click here.

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